Extra chances

He popped into my head one morning. Our lives had intersected and we'd become very good friends.

It'd been some time since we'd fell out of touch. Separation borne of different life paths, it was no fault of ours that'd we'd grown apart. There was always email, still, the effort proved too much for too little return. We simply drifted.

I was struck by a pang of loss. I assuaged my sadness, gently returning it to the locked portion of my heart, from which it slipped.

Breathing deeply and exhaling, I moved forward into the day.

Lunchtime rolled around, I marched myself to the gym. Leaving an ATM, he darted out in front of me in the flesh. In a flash, a torrent of thoughts flooded my mind. What do I do? Do I stop him and say hello? Should I even? Does he have the space in his life for me? He looks rushed Perhaps I shouldn't. I won't.

I didn't miss a beat during my internal dialogue, sidestepping past him and darting into the gym entrance. He hadn't seen me. I sighed in relief. I cursed under my breathe. Why hadn't I spoken to him? I admonished myself. I laughed too. Fate's fickle finger playing games with me. Or did I wish this? did I make this happen? Perhaps, but I wasn't ready.

I let my opportunity slip away to reconnect with him and I had no one to blame but myself. Again, I put my feelings away and brooded. That was that.

So I thought.

Fast forward 2 months to last Tuesday.

Walking from the gym, I saw him again. My heart skipped a beat and a lump caught in my throat. I was given another chance. I hesitated a moment, then I called out his name.

Surprised, he brightened when he recognized me. Promising. We hugged saying hello. We made small talk, catching up with what we were doing with ourselves and our lives. He apologized for falling out of touch. Promising again. Maybe there's hope.

Before the conversation dragged and got too awkward, I figured to part with at least the promise of talking again. Still it was an awkward separation. We didn't have any business cards. I gave him my email. Perhaps he'll write, perhaps he won't. At least I did something and the ball's in his court. I'm hopeful. We'll see.